down-home fascists

maybe i'm just a traitor to my smoking friends, but i'm really happy about this new total smoking ban in athens. for completely selfish reasons of course- i hate the smell of cigarettes. sure, i'm all for personal liberties (some might consider me a libertarian on that issue), but no one is saying that you smokers can't smoke. you just can't do it in public. you can't pee or shit in public either but i haven't heard any complaints about that recently. what's that you say? that's because public defecation is a health issue? exactly. i mean, just because i willingly endanger my liver and up my chances for cirrhosis most nights of the week doesn't mean that i want lung cancer, too. one self-induced mortal illness is enough for me, thanks.

as for the drop in buisness expected by downtown buisness owners, i'll readily admit that i can see a difference in the number of persons patronizing the local bars right now. in fact, i was at the manhattan the other night and there were about 10 people crammed into the tiny outdoor bar space and only two of us inside (well, four if you count the bartenders). room 13 had a similarly low turnout (concentrated outside under a haze of smoke of course). i liked it. sure, the ban might initially be bad for business but, call me crazy, i imagine that most bar flies aren't going to opt to stay home and drink beer all by their lonesomes just so they can wash down each sip with a refreshing puff of tar and nicotine. give it a few weeks and i bet everything will be back to normal at the bars. only less smelly.

of course, in the grand scheme of things, this new resolution isn't really all that important. sure i'm personally happy to wake up after a night out on the town without smelling like a rancid, beer-soaked carton of cigarettes, but that's small change when you think about the state of the world today and where we young, inspired, politically-minded americans should be focusing our energy and anger.

or am i wrong? is this issue what really gets us up in arms? give me a fucking break. and yet the following letter can be found in this week's flagpole magazine:

"I have been an avid smoker for 27 years now, and I am infuriated by the new smoking ban. I agree with the guy who said that this smacks of fascism. I would like to invite all of the smokers out there to engage in a sweeping act of solidarity and commit an act of civil disobedience and meet us in front of the Georgia Theatre on Aug. 13 at 7 p.m. We will meet in front and light up and then form a procession that will march all the way around downtown, stopping off at restaurants and bars along the way, ending up at the courthouse in grand fashion. Feel free to bring your own signs and/ or sandwich boards. Fight for your free choice, Athens!

Edward Holand Athens"

fascism? what? fury? huh? i'm confused. i sincerely hope that this letter is a joke but in case it isn't i would like to say the following:

edward, i understand your desire to express your freedom of choice, but to get all riled up about smoking seems like a waste of breath (cough, cough) and anger. i'm all for civil disobedience as a way to express dissatisfaction with the rule-makers of the world. hell, we could certainly have used some more motivated individuals like yourself prior to the "war on terror". demonstrations and the like can be powerful tools to effect public change but not when that tool is trivialized. i mean, smoking? dude, i don't give a rat's ass if you smoke 2 packs a day for the rest of your shortened lifetime. go for it. it just makes me sad that such a petty issue is what inspires you to take action. think about it. aren't there at least a million other things that your time would be better spent fighting for?

fuck it. now i'm depressed. anyone got a light?